There was absolutely nothing redeeming about the Sandy character, but unfortunately, “Sandy” is the standard birthmother portrayed in most TV shows and movies. Birthmothers are alcoholics, prostitutes, drug abusers, teenagers, uneducated, uncaring, selfish, and cruel. In a culture that gets so much of its “knowledge” from the media, negative birthmother stereotypes have been slow to change. I may not have the qualifications of birthmother myself, but there are many first parents in the world who are selflessly putting themselves on the line to tell the truth about who they are, and who they are not. I believe we owe it to them to listen.

I am a Birth Mother

"I am a birth mother. I relinquished my baby in an open adoption arrangement," I say with pride in my voice and a smile on my face to people in town when they inquire about my shrunken belly but do not see me with a baby in a stroller.

"I wonder why she did that. She's obviously not a teenager. Must have dropped out of school or something," the cashier, thinks when she hears the girls reply.

"She probably doesn't even know who the baby's daddy is," another person thinks.

"I bet she does drugs," a man ponders as his prescription is being filled.

"Is she homeless? Does she even have a job? Could she simply not afford an abortion? So she gave her newborn baby away to strangers," races an older lady's mind as she walks off in disgust.

"I bet she didn't love her kid either," says the adoptee in her mid twenties who had just found out after years of untruths that she was in fact adopted.

Read the rest here.

Here is some additional reading that can help to dispel prevalent myths about first parents:

The Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute report on birthparents contains birthparents statistics that would surprise many, as well as recommendations for adoption reform.

A discussion of the newest stereotype of birthparents being "wheeler-dealers."

And this is an article written by a birthmother who shares her thoughts about being referred to as "birthmother."