I’m betting that if you find some Joe Schmo on the street and ask him to tell you the first ten words he thinks of when you give him the word “adoption,” he’s bound to throw in words like “expensive” and “complicated” and even “dangerous.” He might tell you a story about a friend of a friend whose child was “taken back” by a birthparent or about his adopted cousin who ended up in jail (and of course, those two facts must be related.)

Yes, there are some difficult and awful adoption subjects (baby trafficking, disruption, Reactive Attachment Disorder, wrongful adoption, coerced placements, among others), but when we’re talking about legitimate orphans and children who are otherwise literally without a family to care for them, wouldn’t you say (and yes, I admit that collectively, you’re a biased group if you’re reading this) that adoption is generally a positive thing? Don’t most of us try to send that message on a daily basis? I think we do, so why aren’t people accepting it? I think it’s because if we can successfully send the message to the public-at-large (and in particular to members of the Church) that adoption is generally positive, and that we have a moral obligation to consider it, then the public’s accountability level necessarily increases. And they probably don’t want it to. Ignorance is bliss, right? If they can believe adoption is scary and bad and expensive and always ends badly, then they certainly can’t be expected to involve themselves in it.

I want to be clear that I know that Heavenly Father has a plan for everyone and that not everyone’s “plan” is going to include adoption. The last thing I would want is for parents who truly aren’t prepared or capable, or those who have unrealistic expectations, to start adopting because they think it will earn them points in Heaven. But I also wonder how many people’s plans could include adoption, if they would only ask.

What do you think?

Further reading:

International Adoption