11. Do what Mormon women do best – quilt! OK, that’s a joke. At least to me. I couldn’t quilt to save my life and have to feign illness to save myself from humiliation on quilting Enrichment Nights. But whatever “crafty” things you may know how to do, or whatever hobbies you’re interested in, do them. For me, a valance and a few poorly sewn flannel baby blankets constituted the totality of my sewing efforts, but I did throw myself into the decorating of my new children’s rooms, spent time learning to cook new things, and partook of... more

9. Take a vacation. Everyone knows that finances can be tight in the midst of an adoption, but even if you can’t afford a deluxe Caribbean cruise, you can still plan a last couple-only (or smaller family-only) fling. Putting your plans off into the future a bit (but not so far that they could possibly conflict with your adoption schedule) will give you something fun to look forward to and help take your mind off the wait. Plan a long weekend in a city within a day’s drive. Go camping. Go visit grandparents. If you can’t spare a few... more

7. Diet/exercise. This is “do as I say and not as I do” case. ;) My goal with each adoption has been to LOSE as much weight as I would have gained if I were pregnant, so about 30 pounds. For the sake of full disclosure, I haven’t reached my goal on the first three adoptions, but I’m off to a good start with this one! Happy thoughts, happy thoughts… Anyway, especially since your time will be more limited once you have a new family member, it’s a good idea to use the wait time to get into better shape, eat healthier, and tackle other... more

5. Let someone throw you a shower. Even if you don’t know exactly the age and gender of the child you’ll be adopting, a shower is practically a rite of passage for expectant moms and shouldn’t be denied them just because they happen to be adopting an 8 year old. If you know the size and gender of your child-to-be, a traditional shower will work just fine. If you don’t, the shower can be limited to toys, gift certificates, gifts to help pamper mom, “coupons” a la “This coupon good for one free night of babysitting,” etc.

6. Start... more

3. Decorate the nursery or bedroom (or bedrooms if you’re like me and add a few at a time)! Again, some people think this is bad luck, but if you’re one of them – get over it! It’s fun! Yes, I had to come home from a failed adoption to an empty bed and closet full of new clothes and toys, and yes, it was hard, but we lived through it and went on to adopt another child, who – coincidentally – also needed a cute new bed and clothes. If you’re determined to adopt, you will adopt eventually even if you hit a few roadblocks along the way,... more

No matter what form of adoption you may be pursuing, chances are there’s a lot of waiting involved. Sometimes we try to console ourselves with the knowledge that human gestation is a nine-month process (so we should be able to stand to wait THAT long, right?), but with China adoptions creeping up toward a 20-month wait and some domestic adoptions taking literally YEARS, the waiting can be pretty difficult to get through. Especially when adoption timeframes are open-ended, as they can be with unstable countries, domestic newborn adoption, or trying to adopt a child... more