Additional resources:

The Genesis Group

From the website:

The Genesis Group was established to meet the needs of Black members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, many of whom were descendants of early pioneers, with the hope of reactivating those who had left the Church and of supporting new converts of African descent. It was established in 1971 under the direction of President Harold B. Lee with the assistance of Elders Gordon B. Hinckley,... more

2 Nephi 26:33 "...and he inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; and he remembereth the heathen; and all are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile."

Article of Faith Three

We believe that through the atonement of Christ, all mankind may be saved, by obedience to the laws and ordinances of the Gospel. (emphasis mine)

“Sermons and Writings of Bruce R. McConkie”

"There are statements in our literature by the early Brethren that we have interpreted to mean that the Negroes... more

I can’t possibly do justice to all the different theories (and theories, they are) about curses and lineage and when and where and how the policy began, but I use the story of Abel’s murder and Cain’s subsequent punishment to illustrate that the “knowledge” some church members have on the subject of blacks and the gospel can be damaging to our children. I believe that even neutral and even well-intentioned comments, if doctrinally incorrect, are our responsibility to counter, just as we would any other adoption-related misconceptions. But we can’t educate others if we don’t first educate ourselves, and I sincerely hope that caucasian LDS parents will take this education seriously. At the... more

Another reason it’s a good idea for caucasian parents who hope to adopt transracially to have a handhold on race and church history is because social workers who are aware of the church’s past policy want to know how this will be handled with the child. “What priesthood ban?” is not a good response. If you are going to be a parent of a black child, you owe it to the child to educate yourself. Consider the experiences of one adoptive family:

I will never forget sitting across the desk from the guardian ad litem for my first son in her Milwaukee office. She was a polished, accomplished woman. She was black.... more

Since I was hired to create this blog, I’ve been wanting to tackle the difficult subject of race issues and the Church. In the beginning, it sounded like a logical topic to cover for an LDS adoption blog, knowing that many members adopt transracially. But each time I tried to start mentally composing something, it seemed just too emotionally and intellectually challenging.

I’ve been doing a little “research” over the last few weeks, and I suppose I’ve been trying to get my own bearings on “the facts” and how I feel about them before I write about something... more

The assignment to bring in a baby photo can also be problematic for the adopted child. When my children attended public school, each one was asked to bring a baby photo and current photo to be displayed on the board for a matching game. Kids who could match newborn photos to their grown counterparts could win prizes, so they were all motivated to participate. Thankfully, this happened before we started adopting.

In another scenario, children are sometimes asked to bring in a baby photo and tell their classmates about their families. For one, baby photos of an adopted child may not exist (I have ONE newborn photo of ONE of my adopted children) and two, if the child is a person... more

In our family tree experiment, we were fortunate to be able to work on it in the privacy of our own home and in a way that didn’t single our daughter out in front of 30 other kids. If you’re confronted with an assignment given to your child, and particularly one that requires some sort of verbal presentation, Adoptive Family Magazine gives these suggestions for handing it.

For Younger Children

My Home: Children draw and name the people... more

Yesterday, just prior to writing my last post, my mother and I were discussing school activities that children are sometimes assigned to do, and how they can be problematic for adopted children. Two examples came to mind: the “family tree” project and the “who’s who?” baby photo activity. I had told my mom that because we are a homeschooling family, our adopted children would fortunately be spared these particular challenges. Well, the joke was on me when Lulu came home from Achievement Days last night with a blank family group... more

Just for fun, here’s a list of my “favorite” questions and comments, roughly in order of how frequently I get them. :)

1. Six words: “You sure have your hands full!” Some days it’s all I can do to keep myself from responding, “Gee, that’s clever! You’re the first person who’s ever said that to me! Instead, I usually have a little fun with them and tell them how many I have at home. ;o) I know it’s petty, but I can’t tell you how much I detest having these words thrust at me daily!

2. Is this a daycare? When I answer, “no,” it usually leads into question #3.

3. Which ones are yours? I generally give a quizzical look like I don’t know what they’re... more

So, how do we tackle the negative comments that are couched in kindness?

My number one strategy with strangers is avoidance. As my friend Erin over at the transracial adoption blog recently observed, it’s pretty easy to sense when you are being watched, and it’s often an effective strategy to simply busy yourself with your family and not leave the door open for comments. It doesn’t work every time, but I know from experience that it works a lot!

When I simply can’t escape the “praise” of others, my second strategy is to cut them off before they can get to the “these kids” part of their speech and this approach can... more