I realized that this Memorial Day marked something of an anniversary for our family. Six years ago, we were at the beginning stages of our adoption process. Six years seems like such a long time in some ways (my soon-to-be fourth graders were in diapers?!), but it also seems incredibly short in others. It’s amazing to me that in just six years, we’ve added five children and are working on bringing home our 6th... more

Photo: Lulu, just prior to adoption

Jackson, while still more of the strong, silent type, is also doing incredibly well. He doesn’t talk as much as Cora but is plugging right along, and we’ve discovered that he is a big tease. He flashes his dimpled grin at us while simultaneously doing something he knows he shouldn’t, and all we can do is giggle. It’s hopeless. He gets along really well with Cora and is highly protective of her. If she falls or bonks her head, he’s the first one on the scene to offer hugs and kisses. I love... more

Photo: Cora, 9 months, prior to adoption

Lulu, on the other hand, did fairly well. In the beginning, she averaged about one screaming/crying fit per day, and they gradually tapered off over time. There were periods when she was obviously sad, angry or confused, but she handled them incredibly well and we were able to talk through most of them. (This is a major reason I’m such a huge advocate of studying your child’s language while you’re waiting, if you’re adopting internationally). Lulu was generally open to new foods,... more

Photo: Jackson, 16 months, just prior to adoption

I realized earlier in the week that today marks the six-month anniversary of our Haitian kids coming into our family. Whenever I reflect on our adoptions, I always feel in many ways like it’s been such a short time since the new child/ren joined our family, but in other ways it seems like they’ve always been with us.

Since we had visited our children in Haiti twice during the wait (once in October 2005 and again in April/May 2006), so we elected to have them escorted home... more

Similarly, children may feel strengthened and encouraged to know that once they are baptized and confirmed a member of the Church, they are entitled to the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost. That the Holy Ghost is also known as “Comforter” may be an especially important point to emphasize with older kids who’ve suffered heartbreak. After baptism, the Holy Ghost can comfort them, inspire them, protect them, help them discern truth from falsehood and right from wrong, and help them to gain understanding. All of the “jobs” of the Holy Ghost can translate... more

Once a child has had time to get acclimated, parents may wish to bring the missionaries into their home for formal lessons. (It’s hard for me not to call them “discussions” anymore!) If the child speaks English, this is a relatively simple thing to accomplish and can easily be incorporated as the family’s weekly Family Home Evening, for example. If the child does not speak English, or has very limited English, you really have just two options: one, wait six months or so until the child’s English skills are more established, or two, find a translator. ... more

Children who are adopted before the age of eight can be prepared for baptism in the usual fashion, but children who are older than eight at the time of adoption must be taught by the missionaries if they desire to be baptized, just as any other investigating person would do. Obviously, baptism isn’t a topic that’s necessarily addressed by adoption experts, so I thought I’d offer some advice and information based my own experiences and the experiences of others.

Many adoptive families are anxious to achieve the earthly pinnacle of their family-building... more

Today was our daughter, Lulu's, 8th birthday. It was a wonderful day, and one I hope she will remember for a long, long time. I always find myself feeling a little emotional on my kids' birthdays, and especially on their first birthdays. In many ways, today was Lu's first birthday.

Over the last few days, most of my children had come to me privately to ask what their dad and I had purchased for Lulu's birthday. We normally don't share such secrets because they tend not to stay secrets for long, but I was struck with their reasons for wanting to... more